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Tuesday, November 9, 2010

The Hardest Workout EVER!!

I always here people say " Man, that was the toughest workout ever." Hard workouts are easy to formulate, and here is the secret.

Stupidity+Tons of Reps+ limited recovery+poor choice of weight+ highly technical lifts performed while fatigued = a dumb/hard workout

One more thing, a high powered stimulant always helps

So if you want a hard workout, here you go. Oh, and by the way these are very dumb workouts and if you try them you may be a bit soft upstairs.

10 dumb/hard workouts

1. 45 minutes of jumping jacks

2. 1 mile 200lb sled push

3. Deadlift your bodyweight in reps with no rest. Here is an example.
You weigh 175lbs, you must deadlift 175lbs for the 175 reps with no rest

4. 1/4 mile farmers walk with 125lb dumbells, if you drop the weight you must do 25 burpees as a penalty. Burpees are done every time the weight is put down.

5. Step into the ring with a pro MMA fighter, if you lose you must run a full marathon.


6. Unrack all the dumbells in your gym, load them into your car, Push the car for a 1/4 mile then load the dumbells back into the gym. Repeat twice

7. 20 weighted vest triple clap push-ups. If you fail you must perform an opposing limb bear crawl for 1/2 a mile. Remember, you have to use opposing limbs. I.E...only your right leg and left arm can touch the ground, or vice versa.

8. Perform the Tabata protocol with a 300 lb sled while hungover. If you are not hungover, drink a gallon of milk before the workout.

9. Perform 100 push-ups, then 99, 98, 97....all the way down to 0. Once finished do the same with pull-ups.

10. Swim a mile with your right arm only, but you can only swim the mile in a clockwise fashion.

This was fun, if you need more workouts please ask :)


DISCLAIMER- if you do any of these you are foolish.


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